WEEK 7 | MIND THINGS PT. 1

I have no 'bump' update for the 7th week of pregoness because I honestly feel like I've lost weight! Not like in a "Wahoo Jenny Craig!" way, but for everything I've been shoving into my mouth its not really sticking to my bones. There are days when I feel completely bloated and rather hefty and I can't help but let my gut hang out but it's no baby bump. Also, my boobies. I have boobies? I see where this tenderness talk is coming from. They're certainly tender and firm. They're also still small… However, had I not been anticipating a period, I believe I would be one of those people who "didn't know they were pregnant." No joke. At the beginning I was aware with a few odd changes within the depths of my bod, but now they've all seemed to disappear. I've almost become sort of discouraged at the thought of having a baby because I am so scared that there isn't one there anymore… how sad is that? These doubts make me feel horrible. It's so hard for me to feel a connection at this point because I honestly do not know what to feel. I'm worried if I get too excited my heart will be broken beyond belief. I have so much anticipation for my first Doctor's visit. It will give me SO much relief to see proof that I am actually pregnant. I know I'm not alone when it comes to having thoughts such as these. I don't want to think this way but it's so damn scary. I am youtube obsessed and a forum freak and find comfort in watching/reading other people's stories and experiences. Support from strangers on the internet is so crazy wonderful and I can't wait until Max and I can tell all of our friends and family for the continued support. I'm just reminding myself that worrying is completely normal but it doesn't help anything. Also, stressed is desserts spelled backward so someone please give me some friggin chocolate cake. Or brownies. Or oreo's.